


Are You Here With Me?

by MrMagpie



Category: Gorillaz
Genre: 2doc - Freeform, Canon-Typical Violence, Drinking, Drug Use, M/M, Smut
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-10-24
Updated: 2017-11-13
Packaged: 2019-01-22 15:02:46
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 8,015
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12484356
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MrMagpie/pseuds/MrMagpie
Summary: Plastic Beach era. Murdoc is sick of 2D's pill habit.





	1. ch. 1

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this one just for you guys! You liked my last 2Doc so much I thought I'd feed the beast. You're disgusting and I love each and every one of you. Enjoy.
> 
> (Will try to update this bi-weekly, so stay tuned.)

2D lied on the beach, the ocean water nipping at his ankles. He tried staring directly at the sun. His head felt hot and itchy. He’d lost track of how many painkillers he’d taken today. He wasn’t even in pain, he rarely took them for their intended purpose these days. He wanted to escape this plastic prison. He wanted to go back home, to go back to doing as he pleased, and not be Murdoc’s slave any longer. He hated Murdoc now. He used to look up to him, worship him even, but now he was just sick of him. He was sick of being used and abused. So he stayed in a constant haze, trying to forget where and who he was. He couldn’t wait for this album to be finished. He missed Russel and Noodle. He missed his tiny flat, he missed when he was part of the world. He wondered if anyone even knew he was out here.

“Master wants to speak with you.” He jumped and turned toward the voice. The Cyborg had snuck up on him again. He put his arm over his eyes and sighed.

“Tell ‘em in a minute,” he groaned. He felt something poke against his side. He looked down to see the cyborg holding a gun to him. He sighed again.

“That is not an option. You will go now.”

“Alright alright. Get dat ting away from me,” he said, scrambling to his feet. She walked him inside, keeping the gun held to his back. They got in the lift and made their way up to where Murdoc was, apparently in the recording studio. The gun never left 2D’s back. “Can yew put t’ gun away? I’m going!” But the cyborg said nothing and did not move.

She dropped him off in the studio, saluting Murdoc and going back out to survey the island. Murdoc was sitting in his giant rolling chair, a bottle of rum in his hand, as if he was a king sitting at his throne. 2D plopped down on the worn leather sofa that sat against the wall and put his chin in his hands, looking at Murdoc with a bored expression.

“Oh wot’s the matta luv, yew not happy t’ see yer best mate?” Murdoc said sarcastically.

“Not really.” Murdoc glared at him.

“Well yew betta be ready t’ sing fer me t’day.”

2D closed his eyes tight and opened them again, blinking a few times, trying to bring the dusty floor he was staring at back into focus. He gave up and gazed at the blur of grey in front of Murdoc’s feet.

“Oi Dents, yew fuckin’ high again?”

2D shrugged. “Probly.”

Murdoc groaned and set his bottle down on the floor, standing up and walking towards him. He grabbed 2D by the chin, digging his claws into his skin, and forced him to look up at him. 2D winced at the sensation, though he couldn’t really feel pain right now. He blinked a few times trying to focus on Murdoc’s face, but it was no use. He leaned into Murdoc’s hand, having lost the energy to hold his head up. His eyelids sank. He didn’t really care if Murdoc was about to hit him, he didn’t really care about anything anymore. Murdoc was furious. He moved his hand, letting 2D’s face fall and smack into his belly. 2D kept it there, nearly falling asleep. Murdoc grabbed his throat and pushed him back into the couch. His eyes barely opened.

“Sweet Satan Stu, how t’ ‘ell are yew supposed t’ sing f’ me if yer always too high to even si’ up straigh’?!” he yelled. 2D shrugged, unfazed. Murdoc narrowed his eyes and looked him up and down. He looked pathetic. More pathetic than usual. He almost felt bad for him, almost. “No more pills,” he said sternly.

2D’s eyes snapped open and he looked up at Murdoc. He looked serious. “I need them for me ‘ead!” Murdoc rolled his eyes and made his way to the lift. 2D chased after him, stumbling. Once inside the lift he looked at Murdoc and whimpered. Murdoc softened a bit but he wasn’t giving in. They took the lift all the way down to 2D’s room, where Murdoc marched in, went straight to his bedside table, and took three bottles of pills from the drawer, shoving them in his pockets. “Murdoc please…” 2D trailed off, standing in the doorway holding himself.

“I’ll tell yew when yew need ‘em,” he said, walking past 2D out the door.

“Dat’s not fair! Yew get to drink as much as yew want an’ I actually need those!” 2D begged, grabbing Murdoc’s arm.

He yanked his arm away and backhanded 2D across the face. “I can actually work when I drink, it makes me betta in fact! Yer even more useless than ya already are when yew’ve got these pills in ya! No more,” he screamed, turning to go back into the lift. As the doors shut, he watched 2D stand there holding his stinging cheek, tears streaming down his face.

———

2D went back into his room and collapsed on his bed, sobbing. It wasn’t fair. If Murdoc had just given him a chance he’d see he was perfectly capable of singing no matter how high he was. Did he really come across as being that out of it? He didn’t feel that out of it. He gripped his bed sheets with anger. He was a grown man, Murdoc couldn’t treat him like this. He felt completely powerless. He turned his head to look out his underwater window. The whale had been watching him cry. He made an ugly noise and closed the curtains.

———

Murdoc sat back in his chair and took a swig of rum. He put the pill bottles on his desk and stared at them. He rested his head in his hand and took another swig. He worried about 2D. He had really gone off the deep end since coming to Plastic Beach. He watched him get worse and worse every day. He wasn’t sure how to help him, or if he even wanted to. Why did he care? He only needed him for his voice, who cares if he was depressed and emotional? He knew what he’d done was necessary to get 2D to focus on the album, which was all that mattered. He wondered if he could get him to sing tonight, it was still early enough in the day that the pills could wear off by the evening and he’d get at least one song out of him. He pulled out the song he’d written and looked over the lyrics again.

_Up on Melancholy Hill there's a plastic tree_  
_Are you here with me?_  
_Just looking out on the day of another dream_  
_Where you can't get what you want but you can get me_  
_So let's set out to sea_  
_Cause you are my medicine when you're close to me_  
_When you're close to me_

He wondered if 2D would be sober enough to take the hint. He doubted it. He wasn’t even that bright when his mind wasn’t clouded by drugs, much less in a drugged-up haze.


	2. ch. 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> un-betaed. i don't care.

Murdoc stormed into 2D’s room. It was late in the evening, time to work. He found 2D lying in bed staring at his wall. He had tear stains on his cheeks. Murdoc frowned. _Godamnit._

He walked over and sat at the foot of his bed. 2D barely turned his head to look at him. “Hey bluebird, time to sing for me.”

2D sighed and slowly got up. He would behave while Murdoc had his pills. It was as if his life was in his hands. He supposed it was.

They made their way up the lift and into the studio. Murdoc handed 2D the lyrics and quickly hummed the melody. 2D nailed it the first time, as usual. His beautiful voice nearly brought Murdoc to tears. He sat there staring at him after he’d finished, making 2D feel awkward.

“Yer a fucking god, Stu.” 2D blushed and smiled, sitting down on the leather sofa and pulling his knees to his chest, holding himself.

“Yew really think so?”

“I’ve told yew that before.”

“I know… it’s just nice to hear.” They smiled at each other, it was so refreshing for Murdoc to be nice to him. “Why yew bein’ so nice to me?”

“I like yew more when yer complicit.” 2D sighed and looked at his shoes. He hated how much control Murdoc had over him. “Hey Stu, why don’t yew get drunk with me tonigh’,” he said, offering 2D his bottle of rum.

“‘Aven’t yew been drinking all day?”

“Yes, but I ain’t drunk yet,” Murdoc said with a smile. 2D shrugged and took the bottle, taking a swig and handing it back. “Let’s go outside,” Murdoc offered. They could both use some fresh air. 2D hated being out on the beach when it was dark out, but he wasn’t about to protest and earn himself another slap on the face.

———

They sat on the shore and Murdoc removed his Cuban heels. 2D cringed at the sight of his unkept toenails. He brought his knees to his chest and held himself again, as he watched Murdoc recline back and wiggle his toes.

They drank in silence for what felt like hours, Murdoc seemingly completely relaxed and 2D feeling stiff and awkward. 2D was definitely drunk and just wanted to go to bed, he wondered if Murdoc was equally drunk. Probably, but he knew Murdoc wasn’t one to just get drunk and go to bed.

“Can we go inside now?” 2D asked, shifting his feet. Murdoc didn’t look at him, he stared at the sea as if he was looking for something. He didn’t answer him, either, 2D studied his face. “Wot are yew looking for?”

“Me band.” Murdoc’s voice sounded far away. Stu suddenly felt sorry for him, maybe he wasn’t the monster he thought he was. Maybe he truly cared for his bandmates and missed them. Or maybe he was just disappointed with 2D’s inability to to produce a decent record with him without the rest of the band present. 2D wasn’t sure if he should comfort him, or try to be a better singer for him. He inched his hand toward Murdoc’s and placed it over his. He stared at Murdoc, wide-eyed, nervous, waiting for a reaction. Murdoc’s head turned sharply, looking at him and then their hands. He looked up at 2D again, and scowled. 2D pulled his hand away as if he’d touched something hot. Okay, so comforting him wasn’t happening. He opted for the latter.

“C-can we go inside and work on that song again?”

“Yew did it just fine the first time.”

“I think I could do betta.”

Murdoc rolled his eyes but grinned. Maybe he wouldn’t hit him for touching him after all. “Alright then, let’s go.”

When 2D stood up, he realised how drunk he was. He stumbled and swayed behind Murdoc as they made their way to the lift. Murdoc pressed the appropriate button, and the lift lurched upwards, sending 2D stumbling into his chest. He quickly shoved 2D back, causing him to fall backwards onto his ass and hit his head on the wall. As the lift came to a stop and the doors opened, Murdoc cooly walked out and into the studio. 2D struggled to stand, rubbing his throbbing head, feeling another migraine creeping up on him.

Once inside the studio, 2D pulled out the lyrics sheet and stood at the microphone, clearing his throat. His hands were clammy and his head was swimming. He could hardly see in front of him and his headache was getting worse. Maybe now wasn’t the best time to try to impress Murdoc, but he couldn’t back out at this point.

He cleared his throat again and took a deep breath, Murdoc pressing the ‘record’ button and nodding at him, signalling him to begin singing. He sang the song again, trying to close his eyes to feel the music, but every time he did he wanted to puke, so he stared straight in front of him at he wasn’t sure what. His voice was angelic as ever, but the words were slurred and he was often off-key. He finished and lowered his head, looking at Murdoc. Whatever emotion Murdoc was feeling, he was hiding it well. 2D felt uncomfortable. He sat down on the sofa and twiddled his thumbs, refusing to make eye contact.

Murdoc wanted to yell at him, but he also felt something else for him, he didn’t know what the feeling was, but it wasn’t anger. 2D said he could do the song better, but this take was far worse than the last. He could hardly understand the words he was even singing. His finger hovered over the button to delete the recording, forget it ever happened. But he thought better of it, he kind of liked when he couldn’t understand what he was singing, it added mystery to their songs. It was part of the Gorillaz charm, 2D’s thick Cockney accent and slurred speech unintelligible, especially to the Americans.

2D put his head in his hands and looked at his worn shoes. He was embarrassed, not even the liquid courage sloshing around inside him could help him now. Murdoc watched him, pursing his lips, chewing on something inside his mind. He bit his cheek and sighed, deciding the alcohol would be a reasonable excuse to act kindly toward the blue-haired boy. He walked over to him and sat down next to him, their knees touching, his hand on his shoulder. 2D looked up at him, just barely. He wasn’t crying, and even though it was hard to tell with his black holes for eyes, Murdoc had known him long enough to know the tears were welling up and on the verge of spilling over.

“I’m sorry Murdoc,” he squeaked, “I know dat wasn’t very good.” He looked as if he was about to go rambling on with excuses and apologies but Murdoc stopped him.

“It’s alright Stu, yer drunk.” He gave his shoulder a squeeze, and twisted his face into a look of kindness he wasn’t used to. It felt unnatural. “We can work on i’ tomorrow, afta the hangover.” He tried on a smile, thinking better of bearing his teeth.

2D seemed to perk up a bit. He shifted every so slightly closer to Murdoc, taking his chances, holding his breath. Murdoc moved his hand from 2D’s shoulder and stretched his arm across the back of the sofa, barely a half-assed attempt at putting his arm around him. 2D leaned back and touched his forehead with a pained expression on his face, his blue hair tickling Murdoc’s arm. Murdoc studied his face for a moment, watching it twist and twitch with pain. He bit his cheek again.

“Headache?” he finally asked. 2D nodded. Murdoc sighed, considering letting him have some pills, but thinking better of it. “Yew should go to bed then.”

“I can’ sleep when I’ve go’ a headache. Besides, I wanna stay up with yew a bi’ longa.” 2D opened his eyes and looked up at him. A smile played at the corner of his mouth. Murdoc suddenly wanted to kiss him, but he shot that thought straight out of his mind as fast as he could.

“Why would yew wanna stay up with me?”

“Yer bein’ nice t’ me. Yer neva nice t’ me.” Murdoc felt his face get hot. 2D’s cheekbones pressed at the bottoms of his eyes as he grinned, big and cheesy.

“Yer drunk, Stu. And probly suffering from narcotic withdrawal.”

“Oh stop!” 2D poked Murdoc in the side. It sent electricity through Murdoc’s spine and his face flushed. “Well, maybe I am, but I like it.” Murdoc didn’t know if he wanted to slap him or kiss him. He was so cute it was pissing him off. Murdoc sighed, and silence followed. He stared up at the ceiling, feeling 2D’s eyes on him, which he wasn’t sure what to do about. He would normally shove 2D away, telling him to stop staring, but tonight he was feeling nice — too nice. “Will yew watch a film with me?” 2D finally asked, his voice so soft Murdoc wasn’t sure what he’d said.

“Wot?”

“Will yew watch a film with me, please?” A little louder this time.

“Lemme guess, zombies?” Murdoc smirked, but 2D didn’t seem amused. Desperate, was more like it.

“Do yew mind?”

Murdoc thought for a moment, weighing his options. “Fine,” he finally said with a huff.

2D nearly jumped off the couch, remembering his headache when he stood up and pausing for a moment. They took the lift down to the living room and Murdoc sprawled out on the sofa, watching 2D excitedly put the movie in. 2D lied down on the opposite end of the sofa, eyeing Murdoc. Murdoc turned to him and raised an eyebrow, though his fringe hid it so his face just looked odd. 2D smiled at that, but before Murdoc could slap the smile off his face, he spoke.

“Do yew mind if I put me legs on yer lap? There’s no room to lie down on this sofa.”

_Yes I fucking mind yew poof sweet Satan don’t touch me._ “Why have yew got t’ lie down?”

“It’s okay if yew don’ wan’ me to… it’s just that I’m tired and I’ve got this headache and…”

“Jus’ do it, I don’t care.” _No no no no no don’t touch me._

2D smiled and stretched his legs over his lap, sinking into the couch cushions and getting comfortable. Murdoc wasn’t sure where to put his hands so he decided behind his head would be appropriate. His heart was racing and he was trying to focus on the film, but he couldn’t. He kept glancing at 2D, who didn’t notice. He was completely entranced by the moving pictures on the screen, excited and fighting sleep.

When the film was nearly over, Murdoc heard soft, cat-like snoring and turned to him. He had fallen asleep, looking calm and serene. He took the opportunity to slide out from under him, careful not to wake him up. He found a blanket on the armchair beside the sofa, realising he should have just sat there and feeling stupid. He tucked 2D in and watched him for a moment. _What the fuck is going on with me?_ As he took the lift up to his room, he thought about the song again. _Are you here with me?_ He thought, maybe, tonight he was. He got into bed but he wouldn’t sleep, his bandmate taking over his every thought.


	3. ch. 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thanks for all the kudos and comments guys, you're the reason i'm still writing this! i love you all! cheers. xx

Murdoc lied in bed and waited for the sun to rise before he gave up on sleep and got up. He sighed, and groaned, and rolled over to face the window. He felt like the sun was mocking him, so he made a sour face at it, as if that would make it leave him alone. He got out of bed, slid some discarded trousers on, and went into the studio. He thought playing his bass would distract him from his thoughts, so he played the instrument as if he wanted to break it. He wasn’t sure who exactly it was that he wanted to break.

Meanwhile, 2D stirred at the pounding sound of the bass guitar upstairs. His eyes barely flitted open, and he immediately closed them feeling a migraine surge into his head. He squinted at the open window — the sun was just barely in the sky. What was Murdoc doing up so early? Probably knowing he’d be hungover and trying to make it worse. He sat up and held his head, tears stinging the corners of his eyes. His head hadn’t hurt this bad in a while. He doubted Murdoc would be kind enough to let him have a few pills today, but it was worth a shot. The problem now was carrying his weak body up to the studio to ask for them. He noticed the blanket at his side, and wrapped it around his head in a feeble attempt at deafening the sounds coming from the studio. Memories of last night started to come back to him, and he immediately wondered how he ended up with a blanket on the sofa, cozy and warm, rather than in a heap on the cold floor, having been thrown off Murdoc’s lap. A smile crept onto his face — Murdoc had tucked him in last night and gone to bed without waking him. He blushed a bit and hugged himself — Murdoc was being _nice._ He heard the music stop and immediately composed himself. He feared Murdoc wouldn’t be so nice if he found him holding himself and grinning like a smitten schoolgirl. He pulled the blanket over his face, willing his cheeks to return to normal colour.

Moments later, Murdoc was making his way into the living room, with bare feet, no shirt, and dirty black jeans that were sitting a bit too low on his hips. 2D peaked out from under the blanket and blushed again at the sight. Murdoc caught his eye and he could’ve swore he saw him blush too.

“Oi — Faceache, I… didn’t know yew were up.”

“Yew woke me up.”

“Oh right… sorry.” Murdoc awkwardly scratched his head and plopped down next to 2D, who was still wrapped up in the blanket, trying to hide his blushing and grinning. He felt like he knew Murdoc’s secret, and he was ever so giddy about it. “Wot’s with t’ blanket? Yew a ghost?”

2D giggled and Murdoc couldn’t help but smile back. He desperately wanted to have a look at his face when he giggled like that. He knew the urge to kiss him would be too great though, so he let him stay hidden. He watched 2D calm down and shuffle beneath the blanket before he finally said something.

“I ‘ave a headache.”

“I’m sure bein’ hungova doesn’t help.” 2D moved again, Murdoc assuming he was shaking his head.

“Can I have me pills?” The words nearly stung at Murdoc. He should be happy 2D was complying with this new arrangement, but something about having such control over him made his heart ache.

“Yeh, yew can ‘ave some. C’mon.” Murdoc got up from the sofa and 2D followed him, still wrapped in the blanket but finally letting it fall from his head and lay across his shoulders. They stood in the lift in a silence only Murdoc felt was awkward. He glanced at 2D as the lift lurched upwards. His spiky blue hair was flat on one side where he had been lying on it, the other side sticking straight out as if he’d been electrocuted. Murdoc grinned to himself, holding back as much as he could. But 2D caught him.

“Wot yew smilin’ about?”

Murdoc straightened his face into his signature scowl. “Nuthin.’” The lift’s doors opened, saving him from the situation, and he rushed out and into the studio. The pill bottles were out on his desk. He should probably find a better spot, in case 2D tried to grab them when he wasn’t looking. He poured four out into his hand and offered them to 2D who was sitting on the leather sofa. He took them happily. Murdoc turned to grab him a bottle of rum to swallow them with, but when he turned back around they were gone. Murdoc shrugged and took a swig of the rum for himself, sitting next to 2D who was making a disgusted face.

“Wot?”

“Rum fer breakfast?”

“Oh please,” Murdoc said rolling his eyes. As if 2D hadn’t had alcohol or cigarettes as a meal before.

As Murdoc took a few more gulps of rum, he felt 2D’s hollow eyes on him, and could see a smile stretching across his face out of the corner of his eye. He stopped for a moment, glancing at him, and decided on a bit more liquid courage before facing the boy. That stupid toothless smile would be the death of him.

“Wot?”

“Nuffink.”

Murdoc gritted his teeth. “Yew betta fucking tell me.”

2D broke into a fit off giggles. Murdoc was nervous but he kept his cool. He stared at him with a bored expression, waiting for him to calm the fuck down and tell him what he’s so giggly about. This was getting annoying.

“I know yer secret!” 2D fell over on the sofa, overcome by an even stronger bought of laughter. Murdoc’s face flushed. _You don’t know shit yew fuckin’ tosser._

Murdoc crossed his arms and raised an eyebrow at 2D. “And what would that be, Sunbeam?”

“Yew were _nice_ to me last night, Murdoc. _Nice._ Why?” His laughter had calmed but he was still grinning as he wiped a tear from his eye.

Murdoc sighed and chugged the rest of the bottle of rum. So 2D didn’t know his secret, but he was still not one for confrontation. “We were drunk and yew were bein’ complicit. It’s not like I’ve never been nice t’ yew before, relax.”

“No! Noooo,” 2D pointed an accusing finger at Murdoc, “Yer always drunk and I’m always com… comp… complisss… well-behaved.”

Murdoc looked up at the ceiling and leaned back. _“Not always.”_

“Well… a lot of the time. Wot’s different? Yew ain’t been nice t’ me since we got to this plastic hell and suddenly ya are? I don’t get it.”

“Can’t I just be nice to me fuckin’ singer? If yew don’t like it then I’ll stop,” he snapped. He got up and put his empty rum bottle on the desk, reaching for a new one from the shelf.

2D studied him as he watched him feverishly suck at the bottle of rum. Murdoc was nervous, he could tell that much. But why? “Yew sure are drinkin’ a lot this morning…”

“Will yew fucking piss off?” Murdoc raised his voice. His face was red and he was clutching the bottle for dear life. 2D looked from the bottle to Murdoc, to the bottle again and back to Murdoc. A lightbulb went off in his head. A sly smile slowly stretched across his face.

“Wot the _fuck_ yew smilin’ about now?”

“Nuffink,” 2D winked. “I’m goin’ outside, enjoy yer breakfast, Mudsy.” 2D left him there in the studio, alone with his alcohol and his thoughts kicking and screaming inside his head. He plopped down in his chair, defeated. He stared out the window and drank, lost in thought. That little idiot had him all figured out, didn’t he? No, he couldn’t. _He’d always said 2D was brighter than anyone gave him credit for._

———

2D stepped out onto the beach. It was a bit chilly out, he shivered as the breeze evoked goosebumps from his arms. His headache was starting to fade and he was on cloud nine. Murdoc liked him — he was sure of it. Maybe it was being alone with him on Plastic Beach that made him realise it, he wasn’t sure, but it was finally happening. He saw the Cyborg marching up and down the shore and hurried over to her, trying to march in time with her steps. She paused for a moment, looking him up and down, then continued on as if he wasn’t there.

“Hey Cyborg, does Murdoc like me?” He wondered if the Cyborg had any evidence of what he knew had to be true.

Without missing a beat, she responded mechanically. “Master loves his singer.”

2D blushed. “Do yew know wot love means?”

He heard a ticking in her head before she answered. “Love: an intense feeling of deep affection.”

Okay, maybe she did know. “How do yew know?”

“You are his…” she paused, more mechanical sounds in her head, searching her database for the right word, “songbird.”

2D’s ears felt hot and his heart did a backflip. Murdoc had called him that dozens of times, but it hadn’t meant anything, until today. He was Murdoc’s songbird, and he wanted to sing for him. He took off running back to the tower.

———

2D barged into the studio, finding Murdoc slumped over his desk, bottle of rum in his hand.

“Wot do yew want, Faceache?”

“Don’t call me that, yew love me,” he said, catching his breath.

Murdoc choked. “Wot?”

“What are yew writing?” 2D ignored the question and made his way over to the desk, peering over Murdoc’s shoulder to see new lyrics he didn’t recognise.

“A song, sod off.”

“Can I see?”

Murdoc handed him the sheet of paper without looking at him.

_I'm a scary gargoyle on a tower_  
_That you made with plastic power_  
_Your rhinestone eyes are like factories far away_  
_When the paralytic dreams that we all seem to keep_  
_Drive on engines 'til they weep_  
_With future pixels in factories far away_  
_So call the mainland from the beach_  
_Your heart is now washed up in bleach_  
_The waves are rising for this time of year_  
_And nobody knows what to do with the heat_  
_Under sunshine pylons we'll meet_  
_While rain is falling like rhinestones from the sky_

2D grinned upon reading the lyrics. Murdoc sure had been writing a lot of love songs lately, and now he knew why. He gingerly placed the sheet back on the desk in front of Murdoc, who finally looked up at him, expecting a review of his work. Without a word, 2D kissed him on the cheek. He pulled back and smiled sweetly at him, waiting for it to click.

Murdoc’s face got hot and his skin felt like pins and needles. If he hadn’t been sitting down he may have fallen over. He stared at 2D, his mind completely blank. He watched as 2D’s face turned from a loving smile to a quizzical expression, expecting Murdoc to react, but he couldn’t. He leaned forward slightly, placing his hand on 2D’s cheek, and staring into his black orbs. 2D’s smile came back, and Murdoc couldn’t handle it, so he kissed it. He felt 2D kiss him back automatically, as if that’s what he was expecting him to do. He pulled away and cleared his throat, turning back to his desk and staring at the lyrics sheet. He reached a shaky hand for his rum bottle, the only thing that made sense right now. 2D placed his hand over his, stopping him from picking up the bottle. He looked at him. He knew he looked scared to death and he couldn’t find his bearings. 2D was smiling at him again. He crawled on Murdoc’s lap, threading their fingers together and holding the back of his head with his other hand. He kissed him, it was tender and he could almost taste 2D’s innocent. But he knew his songbird all too well, and he knew he wasn’t innocent. Murdoc’s hand found its way to 2D’s chest, then slid around his waist and to the small of his back, pulling him closer. Murdoc was completely dumbfounded, his brain shut off and his hands and mouth moving entirely of their own accord. 2D was shifting on his lap now, holding his face in his hands and kissing him hard and deep, his tongue politely asking to be let in. Murdoc opened his mouth and let 2D explore it. Normally he was the dominant one, every time he’d played this scenario over in his mind, it was him attacking 2D’s mouth, clawing at his hair, grinding his hips into him, but now that it was actually happening he could only move to react, 2D completely had the upper hand here. 2D softly moaned and mewed into his mouth, swallowing his every breath, his hands pulling and gripping at his hair, his hips persistently grinding into him.

As quickly as it had begun, it stopped. 2D pulled away, sitting back on Murdoc’s lap, breaking the hot friction between them. He had his hands on Murdoc’s shoulders and was smiling down at him. Murdoc loosened his grip on his hips, but kept them there. He blinked twice — his mind still a haze.

“I know yew love me Murdoc. I finally figured it out. And it’s okay,” he kissed Murdoc on the forehead, “I love yew too, I always ‘ave.”

Murdoc’s face was twisted in shock and confusion, still processing what was happening. “I… eh….” He panicked, trying to find the words, his eyes darting around the room. Had 2D paralysed him with his kisses?

2D giggled and kissed him again. “Are yew alright?”

“Yes.” He spat the word out.

2D blinked a few times and raised an eyebrow, before his face softened into a knowing smile. “Okay.” He shrugged, sliding off Murdoc’s lap and standing up. He took Murdoc’s bottle of rum and took a swig. “I’ll be in me room,” he said, before sauntering off towards the lift, taking the bottle with him.

Murdoc sat, still paralysed, in his chair. He watched 2D until he disappeared. All this time he thought he was the one in control, but he realised it had been 2D all along.


	4. ch. 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sorry I haven't been keeping up with updating this regularly, I just haven't been inspired. But then I listened to some MGMT and got 2Doc feels.
> 
> Some smut for you piggies. x

2D collapsed on his bed, taking a few big gulps of the rum he’d stolen. He shuddered as it burned his throat. He was satisfied with himself, he felt like now, maybe, Murdoc would be nice to him from now on, and he couldn’t wait for Murdoc to come down to his room and kiss him some more. He liked kissing Murdoc. He didn’t taste very nice, but he was actually quite a good kisser. He decided to drink and make music on his iPad while he waited for Murdoc to sort his thoughts upstairs. He finally felt in control of the situation, rather than being dragged around by the short hairs by Murdoc.

Murdoc sat clutching his precious bottle of rum, not sure if he should try to sort through his thoughts or drown them in more alcohol. 2D had figured out his secret, and apparently reciprocated his feelings, so what was the problem? The problem, was that now the dullard had control over him. Now, this little power-struggle, this little _game_ was no longer one-sided. Not only was 2D playing the game, but he was _winning._ And Murdoc _always_ won. Now he wasn’t sure what his next move would be, how he would get the ball back in his court. He could easily go down there and shove 2D up against a wall and have his way with him, tease him until he squealed and begged, but was that just what 2D wanted? He wasn’t sure. And he felt so hopeless when 2D reciprocated any physical affection towards him, he felt completely frozen beneath him. How did that little _twerp_ have so much power over him so quickly? He took a gulp of liquid courage and stormed down to 2D’s room.

Murdoc burst through the door, finding 2D on his bed lazily gazing down at his iPad. He met Murdoc’s vicious expression with one of his innocent smiles, putting the iPad on the nightstand and looking at him expectantly.

“Murdoc! Are yew feelin’ betta?”

“Don’t patronise me.”

2D frowned. Murdoc wasn’t sure if he even knew what the word meant. He marched across the room and grabbed 2D by the neck, kissing him hard. He pulled back and was met with 2D’s sly smirk. He wasn’t afraid, shocked, or trembling. Murdoc was all of the above. He shoved 2D back into the headboard, flopping back down on the bed, crossing his arms and huffing. He couldn’t do this. As much as he wanted to just fuck 2D into the mattress and shut him the fuck up, he couldn’t. His hands shook and he glared at them.

“Wot are you so afraid of? It’s only me,” 2D said, scooting close to Murdoc and trying to catch his eyes.

_Afraid_ — that word wasn’t in Murdoc’s vocabulary. “I ain’t afraid of shite,” he barked.

“Yew sure do seem afraid.”

“Fuck _off,_ ” Murdoc spat, shoving 2D back on the bed. He landed comfortably on his back. “Yew ‘ave no idea wot yer on about.”

“Yer afraid of love, is that it? Yer afraid, because no one has ever loved yew without _wanting_ something from yew. Yer afraid, because yew’ve neva loved someone without wanting something from _them._ Yer afraid, because yew haven’t got a clue wot it’s like to love someone unselfishly, and be loved back, wholly, without someone tryin’ to change yew. Is that it, Murdoc?”

Murdoc felt tears sting at the corners of his eyes. Where was his delightful blue-haired idiot? He’d been replaced with someone wise far beyond his years. He made a mental note to give 2D back his mind-numbing pills.

2D’s hand found Murdoc’s knee, and he squeezed it. “Let me love yew, Murdoc. It’s okay.”

“Yew can’t _love_ me, you fucking idiot. Nobody loves Murdoc Niccals. Not even Murdoc Niccals.”

“I can, and I do, and lots of people love yew, Murdoc. Yew just won’t let them.”

Murdoc looked up at him dumbly, certain his facial expression was betraying him right now. He must have looked like puppy lost in the rain, who’d just been offered a bowl of food and a warm bed. 2D just smiled at him, and he hated it as much as he loved it.

“Can I kiss yew now?” 2D asked, innocently. Murdoc glared at him in response, but he kissed him anyway. It was as if 2D was truly trying to _taste_ him. To swallow up as much of Murdoc as he could. He kissed him slowly, gently, one hand making its way to the back of his head and the other snaking around his waist. 2D held him delicately but firmly. Murdoc felt so… _hyperaware_ of every touch he received. The way he responded to 2D’s touches was involuntary, like a reflex, he came undone. His hand found its way to 2D’s hip, the other finding the small of his back. He felt 2D’s tongue drag across his bottom lip and he opened his mouth at his command. 2D’s tongue was slow and curious, much like him. It danced on Murdoc’s, awakening it, pulling it to its feet to dance with him. Just as Murdoc was starting to get the hang of it, 2D’s tongue retreated, but he wasn’t done. His mouth moved to Murdoc’s neck and planted slow, wet kisses down its length, down to his collar bone where he nipped a fresh bruise there, then kissed it gently, as if apologising for being so rough. His hand slid from the back of Murdoc’s head to his chest, where he caressed him before letting it slide to the other side of his waist, joining his other hand in gently rubbing and squeezing Murdoc. His hands soon found Murdoc’s hips, and pulled him into him roughly, contrasting the delicate kisses he was leaving all over Murdoc’s neck and shoulders.

2D pulled back slowly, as if he was afraid the sudden loss of contact would send Murdoc into shock. Murdoc opened his eyes he hadn’t realised were closed, and stared at 2D. His expression full of wonder and fear, 2D’s smile warm and familiar. It was in that moment he thought his home might be wherever 2D was. _He wanted to live in that smile forever._

“Should we get more comfortable?” 2D offered, gesturing toward the pillows on the bed. Murdoc slowly nodded and crept towards them, lying down on his back, wide eyes staring up at the ceiling. He could see the dramatic rising and falling of his chest out of his peripheral, and he cursed himself for being… _afraid,_ something he wasn’t sure he was finally ready to admit.

2D crawled on top of him and swept the hair from his forehead, kissing him there. “We can stop if yew want.”

“N-no.”

“Okay.”

2D leaned in and kissed him again, Murdoc’s hands bravely finding his hips and pulling him into him. 2D’s lips didn’t linger at his mouth for long, before he was back at his collar bone, his hands sliding up Murdoc’s shirt, sending shivers down his spine.

“Let’s get this off yew,” 2D whispered, tugging at his shirt. Murdoc complied, and stared at the hem of 2D’s shirt, biting his lip. As if he’d read his mind, 2D tugged his own shirt off and discarded it, looking down at Murdoc, running his hands over his chest and down his sides. Murdoc cursed himself for turning red. 2D had seen him shirtless before, had seen him naked, even, Murdoc Niccals had no shame. But now suddenly, he felt like an ugly little slug in the presence of a blue-haired god.

As if reading his mind again, 2D spoke, softly, as if his voice was designed only for Murdoc. “You’re beautiful, Murdoc. Do yew know that?” He found Murdoc’s eyes, and there was that stupid smile again. A smile twitched at the corner of Murdoc’s mouth, but never fully formed, so 2D leaned down and kissed the spot, as if he might pull that smile out from its hiding place.

2D’s kisses and love bites trailed down Murdoc’s body, eliciting tiny moans from Murdoc’s mouth, in octaves he didn’t know he could reach. 2D slowly, agonisingly, undid Murdoc’s fly, looking up questioningly, asking with his eyes if it was alright if he went further. Murdoc just bit his lip, pleading with his eyes to just take him already. 2D smirked, that devilish little smirk that few got to see. Murdoc felt absolutely _blessed_ he got to see his singer like this. 2D’s hand snaked inside Murdoc’s trousers. Murdoc wasn’t wearing any underwear, to no one’s surprise. Once his hand made contact with Murdoc’s bare skin, Murdoc inhaled sharply, 2D’s sly smirk growing. Slowly beginning to stroke Murdoc, 2D moved up and found his lips again, crashing into them. This time though, Murdoc dominated. He grabbed 2D’s face and kissed him feverishly, deeply, his tongue sliding down 2D’s throat, _drinking_ him in. He moaned in 2D’s mouth, and bucked his hips, begging him to speed up his strokes, but 2D only pushed his hips down back into the mattress, and kept his strokes at an agonising pace. 2D pulled away from the kiss, a whimper leaving Murdoc’s lips and following his.

“I want yew… inside me, Murdoc. Can yew do that for me? Can you cum inside me?”

He just stared at 2D with wide eyes. He tried to speak, he really did, but the words 2D was say to him were just too… _filthy._ How could he compete with something so raw and intimidating? The truth was, 2D _terrified_ him, but he also made him feel at home, a comfort he’d never felt before. He felt a comfort in 2D, and maybe that was why he loved him. He had literally crashed into this precious, perfect thing, and now he was part of his life, and now he was begging him to _cum inside him,_ and it was all too much. Time stopped as he looked at 2D’s wanton expression with his own terrified, confused, dumb one.

“Murdoc…?” _Oh god, had he just been staring at him wordlessly this entire time?_

Murdoc swallowed dryly. “Stu… I… yes. I’m.. yes — yes I can do that.”

2D smiled, relieved, and Murdoc pushed his hip until he was lying on his back, Murdoc slipping out of his trousers and crawling on top of him. He went straight to 2D’s trousers, fumbling with his fly for a moment before his shaky hands pulled them off, along with his briefs. Murdoc gazed down at him dumbly for a moment, before 2D spread his legs, reminding Murdoc why he was here in the first place. Murdoc snapped back to reality, then looked at 2D dumbly again, realising he was unprepared.

“Lube?” he asked, in a hushed tone, as if the word was too filthy to say out loud.

“Drawer.” 2D said it like a command.

He leaned over and pulled the bottle from his bedside table’s drawer, automatically squirting some onto his fingers and warming it between them. He looked at 2D again, who met him with that warm, familiar smile, and _godamnit_ if he couldn’t help but smile back. He sat back on his knees and held 2D by the hip with one hand, the other, shaking, massaging his entrance. 2D seemed to let out a breath he’d been holding upon the contact, almost like a sigh of relief. Then as Murdoc’s finger began to inch inside him, he bit his lip and let out a whimper. He kept eye contact with Murdoc, which drove him mad, and encouraged him to go deeper, to really work him into a frenzy. 2D clutched at his arm, his other hand clutching the bedsheets. His eyes fluttered shut periodically, only to snap back open and catch Murdoc’s gaze once more. Murdoc added a second finger, and 2D moaned. _He moans like he sings, like a fucking angel,_ Murdoc thought, suddenly feeling like it was too dirty of a thought and blushing. 2D didn’t seem to notice, as he dug his nails into Murdoc’s arm and whispered strings of curses muddled with Murdoc’s name. It was the most beautiful song he’d ever heard.

“M-Murdoc.. I’m… stop, I’m ready,” 2D choked out, releasing his grip on Murdoc’s arm and taking his other hand, pulling it out of himself. “Lie down,” he commanded, and Murdoc immediately complied.

2D crawled over him and positioned himself above his cock, grabbing it at the base and slowly easing himself onto it. As he pushed all of Murdoc into himself, he let out a shuddered breath, his legs shaking slightly. He shifted into a more comfortable position, Murdoc watching the whole thing in shock and awe. 2D slowly began rocking, sliding Murdoc in and out of him, his moans and whimpers harmonising with Murdoc’s own choked moans and curses. It was too much for Murdoc, he sat up slightly, grabbing 2D’s hips, burying his face in his shoulder, thrusting up in time with him. 2D wrapped his arms around Murdoc’s neck, holding his head in place, cursing into his mop of hair.

“Murdoc… touch me… please… I’m close…” 

Murdoc did as he was told, stroking 2D a few times before he was cumming on his hand and their bellies. A few more thrusts and Murdoc came inside him as well, just as he had requested.

2D pulled away from him, grabbing his face and kissing him sloppily, lazily. He started giggling and kissing his face, as Murdoc tried to come back to reality from his post-orgasm haze. He found himself feeling differently, than any other time he’d had sex. He was full of _love._ So full it felt like butterflies trying to escape from his belly, up his throat, into 2D’s mouth. For a moment he wondered if he would throw up.

2D pulled himself off him and plopped onto the bed next to him. He was grinning wildly, an innocent smile full of joy and, maybe, _love._

“Come here.”

Murdoc curled up next to him, and suddenly, he felt like he might float away. He clung to 2D’s side and buried his face in the crook of his neck. He felt a lump in his throat and — oh god — was he going to _cry?_

“Do yew feel betta, Murdoc? Are yew alright?” 2D tried to catch a peek at Murdoc’s face, but it was shoved forcefully in his neck.

Murdoc sighed and allowed the tears to well up in his eyes, but they wouldn’t fall. “I feel… _something._ ”

“Well… I hope it’s something good.”

“It’s something _fantastic,_ Stu. Blood fucking brilliantly _fantastic._ ”

2D smiled at the ceiling. “I feel it too… I love yew, Murdoc.”

Murdoc blinked three times.

“Yew don’t have to say it back, I understand, I just want yew to know that —“

“I love you, Stu.”

2D smiled again, and held Murdoc in comfortable silence for a while. 

“Let’s get a shower, love.”

“Good idea.”


End file.
